I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
