Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
NoShamevember. You game?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
