D3 body, D1 cock
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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