Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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