i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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