is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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