I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You made out with two different species that night
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
