Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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