Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
