i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
