The maid of honor just puked.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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