their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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