My girlfriend figured out who you are.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
