they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
zippers are such a cool invention
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
