normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
These tits shall not be calmed
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
