so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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