please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
