Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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