It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize