You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize