were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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