You work out of a Hotel?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Randomize
