Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
