He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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