whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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