super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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