I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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