How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Randomize
