like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
