You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
