My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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