I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Randomize
