i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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