Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
