i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He better not be in your backpack
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
