I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
