I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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