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  I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.

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• "I broke my toaster making an egg" HAHAHAH

  Submitted by sssmarie on Nov 24, 11 at 5:02pm

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• You're doing ALL OF IT wrong

  Submitted by jnyhammerstix on Nov 24, 11 at 5:04pm

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• Quitting drinking is never the answer. Accepting that life is more surreal than a Salvadore Dali painting is the answer.

  Submitted by mad2physicist on Nov 26, 11 at 12:09am

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• Bet you send a similar text about 52 times a year....

  Submitted by GA_Peach on Nov 25, 11 at 1:36am

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• Nobody likes a quitter.

  Submitted by thekandymaan on Nov 24, 11 at 1:39pm

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