I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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