By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
