I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize