why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
