in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
