I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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