you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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