I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
