you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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