all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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