I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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