do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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