Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
you inspire me to be a worse person
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
