dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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