guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
